LCC 2008 – Part 3/Suspicious Super Shuttle

Posted on April 5, 2008 by Dana

The ride from the airport was, at least for the first 20 minutes or so, uneventful. The landscape was flat, covered with brownish gray scrub brush and patches of dirty snow. I could see mountains in the distance. I didn’t notice any immediate affect of the higher altitude, but my sinuses didn’t have much nice to say about the lack of humidity.
Lots of industrial complexes and hotels as we got closer to the city, Day’s Inns and Applebee’s territory. The driver exited the freeway (or do they call them ‘highways’ in Colorado?) into hinky looking industrial part of town, lots of chain link fences, graffiti’d brick walls, safety bars on windows and padlocked doors. The occasional bar, greasy spoon eatery (and one strip club) broke up the monotony of warehoused auto repair stores and parts manufacturers, but I didn’t see any people.

My mind immediately went to ‘this would be a great setting for a zombie movie!’ My mind often travels this path in its spare time, along with ‘if I were here when the zombie apocalypse hit, what building would be the most easily fortifiable and practical?’ Hey, I’m not the only one I know who thinks this way.
Before I could decide if I’d rather hole up in a bolts manufacturing company (totally surrounded by chain link) or Zeke’s Autoshop (solid sliding metal doors and next door to a Mexican restaurant that could be raided for supplies), a large car, Cadillac or Buick or some other big American gas guzzler (the old fashioned kind, before Humvees came into popular use – damn you, Ahnold!) pulled up next to the driver’s side of the shuttle. Both drivers saluted each other with a wave. Ours rolled down his window; the front passenger window of the Caddibuick was already open. Both cars reached a red light and a conversation commenced in a foreign language I didn’t recognize. Which means it wasn’t English, Spanish, French, Gaelic, Cantonese, Mandarin, Polish, Russian or Japanese. I don’t know all these languages, mind you, but I do hear them on a semi-regular basis here in San Francisco.

What I didn’t assume (using one of my barometers for logical thinking, which is ‘what would George Dubya NOT do’) is that the drivers were Islamic terrorists on a suicide bomb mission. Then, of course, my mind started concocting a South Parkian/Team America scenario in which it WAS a terrorist plot to destroy the Adams Mark Hotel and take out the mystery writers of America. Why? Didn’t matter. I was having fun picturing myself and the SinC members I’d met so far as Thunderbirds style puppets.
Meanwhile the stoplight changed to green and both cars moved forward about 20 miles an hour, conversation still going. I exchanged looks with my fellow passengers. This was kind of weird, not to mention potentially hazardous to our health if other cars came along and our driver didn’t start paying attention to the road.
They reached another stoplight and our driver picked up a white wrapped package next to him and tossed it into the passenger window of the Cadibuick. Eyebrows raised all around this time. “Some extra money on the side?” said the woman next to me just loud enough for us to hear. The driver was oblivious, still talking to his buddy as the light changed and they began rolling again. They reached a fork in the road and our driver went straight while his friend/business acquaintance drove off to the left.
I was dying to ask what it was all about, but didn’t quite dare as the super shuttle driver settled back into stony-faced silence. Chain link fences and graffiti gave way to a much more upscale downtown area and we reached the Adams Mark Hotel in short order. I got out along with the man in the backseat.
Heh. If he was another LCC attendee, I wondered which of us would use the incident in a book or story first.

Upcoming Virtual Book-signing Events

Posted on March 3, 2008 by Dana

My friend and fellow writer Steve Prosapio, is holding Bookdays on his blog, virtual interviews and book drawings with four writers, including myself. Steve’s blog is here. Below, in his own words, is a more comprehensive description of the events. Please stop by his blog, both on the dates mentioned and just to check it out! And yes, a free copy of MURDER FOR HIRE: The Peruvian Pigeon, will be up for grabs!

“They say that March comes in like a lion…

But I’m hereby declaring the next thirty days, “March out and buy a book” month! In support of that, I’ll be hosting virtual “book-signing” events each Wednesday this month on my blog. In fact, I’ll no longer refer to the fourth day of the week as “Wednesday” any longer. It’s now called “Bookday.”

Okay, that last part might be a bit over the top, but the “book events” will be fun.

Without further ado, here’s who will be joining us:

March 5th – Chicago, IL

Geoffrey Edwards, author of Fire Bell in the Night, a historical novel set in antebellum South Carolina that centers on the trial of a man who helped an escaping slave.

March 12th – San Francisco, CA

Dana Fredsti, author of Murder For Hire: The Peruvian Pigeon, an almost-cozy murder mystery about an acting troupe that specializes in spoofing, not sleuthing…until bodies start stacking up.

March 19th – Sienna, Italy

My review of Too Much Tuscan Sun by Dario Castagno, a memoir of a Chianti tour guide. I recently met Dario at a book signing. I’d corresponded with him from time to time since purchasing his book in 2005.

March 26th – New York, NY

Seymour Garte, author of Where We Stand: A Surprising Look at the Real State of Our Planet. This nonfiction work explores environmental topics and suggests what we can do to better care for the earth.

Stop by for any/all of these events on my blog. Interviews with the authors will be posted and some of them have agreed to stop by the blog that day to discuss their work and answer questions from the audience (aka the No Bull Gallery). You do NOT need to be registered with Live Journal to participate. You can post anonymously (hit the “anonymous” button after clicking your comment), but please make sure to put your name on the post. Books and/or gift cards will be given away on the Friday following the visits to those who participate.

Don’t miss out on your chance to “mingle” with published authors (and win free books)!

Again, these events will be held ON MY BLOG on the posted dates. I will be “replaying” the interviews, so to speak, on my gather.com home page but if you want to win prizes, come and post to the BLOG itself. “

I am the Liberty Bell!

Posted on February 19, 2008 by Dana

I went to a Capitol Crimes (Sisters in Crime, Sacramento Chapter) meeting this Saturday as the guest speaker. Dave went with me, in a combination of pack horse (he lugged the book boxes), actor and moral support. My sister Lisa also joined us as she was up from Venice Beach for her birthday. We drove separate cars from our house to Sacramento as Lisa has a sometimes cranky back and my Saturn, which would have fit all three of us and our gear, is not necessarily the best car for that. She has a Mini, a cute little red and white one, and although it’s comfy and adorable, it does not have the trunk space we needed for the trip.

We rendezvoused at Perko’s Grill and Cafe in Rancho Cordova where the Sacto Sisters have lunch before their meetings. They were just a delightful group of women, some professional writers themselves, some aspiring authors, all of them voracious readers and so nice! Dave was an honorary Sister for the day and handled himself well as the only male in a group of around 20 women. No huge shock, that. And they didn’t seem to mind the extra shot of testosterone he brought to the mix. Lisa had just gotten her own literary agent (yay, Lisa!), so she fit right in the conversation and had some good advice to share.

The meeting itself was at the Rancho Cordova Library. Now I’d mapped out the journey weeks in advance, using Google Maps. Oh, foul Google Maps! Assuring the helpful Sisters I knew how to get to the library, we set off following the directions I’d googled (as did Lisa, who had the same directions as us) and ended up on the correct street, but going in the wrong direction. We figured this out as the addresses went up in number instead of down to the 9000 block, where the library was. D’oh!!! So we flipped a U (and I mentally flipped off Google Maps) and drove as fast as the traffic would allow down Folsom, a busy street with many stoplights and more Sunday drivers than should be legal on a Saturday.

I will admit to being a little (a lot!) stressed. I hate being late and every minute the clocked ticked closer to 1:00, the higher my blood pressure rose and the more vociferous my swearing became. When poor Dave tried to calm me down, I’d snarl “I. Just. Have. To Get. This OUT OF MY SYSTEM!”

Now in my defense we’d received some very bad news Friday in the late afternoon and we were already dealing with a huge amount of stress. I like to think I’d have been a little calmer had things been different, but I’m sure there would have at least been some mild cursing. As I said, I hate being late. I knew in the back of my mind the Sisters had business to take care of before my presentation and my being 5-10 minutes late wouldn’t hold up the meeting, but the rational part of my brain was obviously being held at gunpoint by my inner White Rabbit ’cause common sense never made it past the ‘omigod, I’m LATE!!’

We finally made it to the library, which is located about three blocks away from Perko’s. Sigh. Got the books, the presentation board with all the old MFH material, the boombox and noir cds, and ourselves inside and all was well. Two of our Brackmann cousins, Jill and Sammie, were there. Jill was dolled up for a wedding she was attending right after the presentation and Sammie was noired out to the hilt in green and black satin and velvet, with four inch green satin heels, and a little black torque perched on the back of curly auburn hair. They both looked quite smashing. My cousin Lindy also showed up a bit later even though she was not feeling well. So a special thanks to all three cousins and Lisa for going out of their way to come see me do my schtick.

Dave started out the presentation with a short monologue (backed by appropriately noirish music) from The Peruvian Pigeon (which, for those of you not familiar with the history of my mystery…heh…that rhymes…was the first script Maureen and I wrote for Murder for Hire many years ago), which was much appreciated by the audience. I think it was both the effectiveness of his performance and the fact he looks cute in a fedora and trenchcoat). The monologue ends with “…and SHE walked in.” A great cue for me to start my presentation if I do say so myself.

I’ve done this presentation a few times now and get more comfortable with it with each new appearance. I basically talk about the history of Murder for Hire, both the theatrical troupe and the novel, going off on tangents about chocolate, supermodels, show anecdotes, screenplays, whatever happens to come up during the talk. I love fielding questions from the audience and this group was the best yet in terms of having plenty of questions to throw at me. After the presentation, I sold and signed books. I seem to be incapable of just signing my name; I feel obliged to write a mini-novel for each inscription. I’ve been told by more seasoned authors I’ll get over that the first time I do a really big signing. Heh.

The Capitol Crimes group also sold and signed books; CAPITAL CRIMES, an anthology of short stories written by members of their group. Dave and I bought one and I’m looking forward to reading it.

What, you might ask, does this all have to do with the Liberty Bell? Well, I’d brought my camera to the event and Dave took pictures of me as I was giving my talk. I saw the pictures yesterday, showing me in my slinky black top, red flowing skirt made out of Saree fabric, and black boots and for all the world, the shots all made me look bell shaped and much heavier than I’d like to think I appear in real life. I told Dave I looked like a big fat bell and he said I was cracked. Hence the Liberty Bell.

And you didn’t think I’d ever come to the point, did you?

The pictures had one positive affect (after reducing my slowly building self-esteem to rubble) – my motivation to exercise has revved up to high gear, I’ve started taking calorie counting seriously (did you know if you order a goat cheese, strawberry and spinach salad with candied walnuts and raspberry dressing you can reduce it from 880 calories to 280 by switching the dressing to a vinaigrette and cutting out the walnuts?) and I’m going to remember to stand up straighter when I give my talks! More yoga!

Potential

Posted on February 11, 2008 by Dana

I’ve spent a large portion of my life collecting items and ideas with the goal of realizing their potential. This is why I’ve spent my adult life carting around and storing boxes, bins and tins of fabric, shells, beach glass, pieces of driftwood, battered picture frames, old jewelry bits, beads, pieces of furniture on the very shabby side of chic, news articles, pictures torn out of magazines, scraps of paper with one line notes scribbled down on them, stories with one paragraph written… the list goes on. When I actually buckle down and spend time on one of these projects, be it craft oriented or writing, I’m usually pleased with the results; I think I have a knack for visualizing the finished product. It’s the buckling down part that gets in the way.

There’s a quote about genius being 1 percent inspiration and 99 percent perspiration (I may have the percentages wrong, but you get my drift) and it’s very true. I get inspired a lot, but getting off my butt to act upon that inspiration…well, let’s just say I do most of my perspiring in yoga class. And yes, I know this is figurative perspiration. Or would it be more apt to say metaphorical sweat? Either way, I’m trying to get myself on a schedule of sorts to allow for the time and energy to achieve potential instead of just dreaming about it. To clear out some of those boxes of bits and turn them into something else. And most importantly, to stop talking about my ‘next writing project’ and just write the damn thing.

I’ve got to get through that door…

Posted on February 7, 2008 by Dana

I don’t know about you, but when I get home from work, I can’t relax until all the chores that need to be done are completed. I’m like a shark – if I don’t keep moving, I’ll sink into a sea of apathy and exhaustion. Nothing will get done. It doesn’t matter how late I work, how exhausted I am. 10 cats and one dog need feeding, floors need sweeping (10 cats generate a lot of pine litter dust), litter boxes need cleaning…there are usually dishes to be washed, laundry to be folded. And if I’m REALLY lucky, one of the kids will have upchucked his/her breakfast and there will be cat vomit to be cleaned up.

Sigh.

I’m tired all over again. Tonight included all of the above, btw. And let’s not forget the recycle and garbage.

By the time I’m finished with all of these things, I’m wiped. My brain is mush, my body exhausted and conjuring up creative energy is a challenge. But part of being a writer is…well…actually WRITING. Working on something. Not just resting on my laurels (and my butt) and thinking about writing. But dang, there are days when I wish I could put corks in my little darlings. I won’t say which end. I’m sure you get the idea.

Grumpy Post

Posted on February 1, 2008 by Dana

How, you might ask, is it possible for a person to be grumpy when surrounded by purring felines, sipping a glass of good Cabernet Franc, and watching ONCE MORE WITH FEELING? I mean…the Buffy musical generally cures all ills. Cats are like Tribbles – holding one is an automatic stress reducer. But when three cats are vying for lap space with my MacBook, it makes writing very difficult. “Put ’em down!” you say.

Right. YOU try it. I put one down, another takes its place, like army ants. I am Leningan and the cats are my army ants. Except they don’t strip my flesh from my bones if they catch me sleeping. And if you’ve never read the story Leningan and the Ants or seen THE NAKED JUNGLE (with a VERY young Chuck Heston as the lead and Eleanor Parker as his mail order bride wearing a truly amazing brassiere throughout the film), you will be wondering what the hell I’m talking about. Get thee to Netflix, says I!

But I digress.

I am specifically grumpy because, after a wonderful yoga class tailored to help boost my immune system (people at work have been dropping like flies with influenza), I pinched a nerve my neck and shoulder while shredding some confidential documents at work. As office manager (or Senior Adminstrative Coordinator, depending on which business card I hand you) I’m in charge of purchasing office supplies. So when our old wimpy shredder jammed and no amount of coaxing, cleaning or kicking could make it work again, I bought a new one. I wanted a macho shredder this time around, one that could take at least 15 pages without pause. I found one in the Quill catalogue advertised to shred multiple layers, CDS…it was even supposed to eat staples!

Sigh.

My macho shredder is a big wimp.

But Spike’s cheekbones…okay, feeling better now… Sing, Spike, sing! Let me rest in peace indeed…

Sorry. I do love me my Buffy musical…especially Spike. Grrrrrrrowwwwwllllffffff!

Back to the shredder. This supposed Superman of shredders is a total wuss. Yes, it does eat staples. But ask it to eat more than 5 pieces of paper at a time and it’s all *cough* *cough*…’it’s too much! I feel faint! Give me mah smellin’ salts!’ There’s a huge bag to collect the shredded paper, but the bag only fills a quarter of the way before the machine decides it’s full and stops running. You can’t hang the bag out of the front in order to make more room because if the door’s open, it won’t run. Stupid, temperamental piece o’ crap. And insult to injury, I pinched the nerve while stuffing the shred down into the bag.

I mean, what a dippy way to injure myself. It’s almost worse than throwing out one’s back while sneezing. “I hurt myself shredding!”

Although I could let people think I was talking about shredding waves. Anyone who’s seen me surf would know better.

It’s hard to fight the good fight against flu bugs when you can’t turn your head without pain. My birthday is Saturday and I don’t want to be sick or in pain. I’ve got plans, dagnabbit! I’m going to a Sisters in Crime meeting with Dave ad then we’re going to Rick and Jen’s for a duo birthday celebration (me and Jen, whose birthday was yesterday) involving a lamb dinner cooked by Rick, excellent wine and movies. We are bringing SKYSCRAPER, a truly craptacular DIEHARD ripoff with Anna Nicole Smith in the Bruce Willis role. I mean, you don’t get much worse than that. In my world, that much bad is really really good.

So no flu! No neck pain! And no more stupid wimpy shredder!

Ah well. If I still feel crabby tomorrow night, I’ll put on the ‘Buffy and Spike bring down the house’ episode and play the last 10 minutes over and over again. I’ll take my cheap thrills where I can get ’em, thank you!

Dates for my Tour!

Posted on January 15, 2008 by Dana

Yes, the tour for Murder for Hire: The Peruvian Pigeon, is slowly coming together. I will have an official page for this on my website under The Goods section, but what’s the use of a blog if I can’t further promote myself and my lovely host bloggers? I’m very excited about this, but the coolest part is the wonderful blogs I discovered when researching the tour and meeting some incredibly talented and nice people. Please take a look at my list of tour stops:

Sunday, January 20th

Elysabeth’s Emerald City

Monday, January 21st
Blogbooktours.com

Tuesday, January 22nd
Kat’s Random Thoughts

Wednesday, January 23rd
Chrysalis Stage

Thursday, January 24th
Kitty Litter

Friday, January 25th
Pointless Drivel

Saturday, January 26th
Redzilla Attacks!

These are all on my blogroll, which got ate by WordPress when I added my RSS feed and link to the blogbooktours group on yahoo. My lovely and talented website designer, Leslie Keats, is working on recovering said blogroll and my blog archives. If you need website design, I cannot recommend her highly enough! And aside from her web design talents, she surfs and enjoys drinking wine while watching bad movies. My kinda gal!

Gearing up for the Great Blog Book Tour of 2008!

Posted on January 9, 2008 by Dana

Dang me, this blog book tour thing is a lot of work! I was told by the Yoda of Blogbooktour.blogspot.com (that would be Dani) that I need to put a sitemeter on my blog. The secret of adding this sitemeter is hidden somewhere in my WordPress dashboard, possibily under ‘widgets.’ I have gone my entire life without the need for widgets (which rhymes with ‘midgets’, ‘fidgets’ and ‘gidgets’, doncha know…) and suddenly I’m forced to explore this strange new world of cyberstuff.

Widgets.

Feh.

Upcoming Blog Tour

Posted on January 8, 2008 by Dana

Yes, that’s right. I’m actually going to DO this blog book tour I’ve been dropping hints about for the last month! It’s going to start the Monday of the third week of January. If I had a calendar nearbye, I’d give you the date. but I don’t and I have felines lounging on me and can’t get up to check. Does this make me lazy? Perhaps. Or does it make me a good mother? I prefer to look at it that way.

So I’m gonna be doing interviews and guest posts at…six different blogs, hosted by six diversely talented writers and bloggers. Still working out the logistics, but we will be having several drawing for free copies of my book, MURDER FOR HIRE: The Peruvian Pigeon. If you win, you’ll have to bake your own chocolate chip cookies to eat while reading it, but the book itself will be free.

I will be posting a schedule with the dates and urls of the blogs I’ll be visiting and hope you’ll stop by all of them and check it out!