I had someone refer to me (and Dave) as mingers today, based on a photo Dave had posted.  A ‘minger’, in case you’re not familiar with the British expression, is an unattractive person of either sex.  The commenter was a total stranger, even by Facebook standards.

I’ve spent most of my adult life getting attention and/or approval because of my looks.  I got used to being all that and a bag of chips and, as Rhett once told Scarlett, definitely suffered from the illusion that I was “the cutest trick in shoe leather” in any given room.  Luckily I had a mother who put in into perspective when, fed up with me  and my equally vain best friend, that someday we’d have to get used to the fact that we wouldn’t be able to stop traffic unless we stepped in front of a truck.

Thank you, Mom, for a much needed slap of reality at an impressionable (and intolerable) point in my vain youth.  Even though I was sure I’d never REALLY age, I realized I needed to develop a lot more than my looks.  So I did.

Now I’m nearing fifty (ohmygod, ohmygod) and definitely realize I’m no longer the cutest trick in shoe-leather in any given room.  I’m still reasonably attractive, but no, I don’t stop traffic any longer.  Although I haven’t tested the truck theory yet.  And … I’m okay with this.  I no longer require external validation for my looks.  I get enough of that at home and that’s where it really counts.  So being called unattractive by someone I don’t know, as rude as it is, isn’t the issue.  He could have called us stupid or stinky or whatever … my reaction would still be based on the same thing and that is a total lack of tolerance for bad manners and inappropriate behavior, on line and off.

Maybe this person thought he was being funny.  Or maybe he is an online troll, randomly dropping nasty little bombs and shitty comments just for the sake of creating chaos.  I don’t know.  Either way… in what universe did he think this would be appropriate?  I am fed up with people thinking it’s okay to say whatever pops out of their mouths or typing fingers without thinking of the possible ramifications those words could have on the recipient(s).  Lots of people practicing random acts of malice and/or thoughtlessness out in the world these days. 

So English guy who called us mingers … I don’t give a rat’s ass what you think of my looks.  What I care about is that you’re yet one more person adding to what’s bad about the ‘net and the world in general.  Think before you post. You have the choice between potentially ruining someone’s day or making it.  Or… just staying out of it.