Today has already been a very good day. I very rarely sleep the whole night through, but the last two nights I’ve fallen asleep around 10:30 and slept till 6:30, waking up slowly and naturally around 7:00. Okay, yesterday morning Bug Bear helped me wake up by chewing on my chin, but there were no 1:00 am trips to the bathroom, no darkest before the dawn fits of insomnia as my brain chewed over everything I’m worried about, no panic attacks…just peaceful, dream-filled sleep. I love dreaming and will lie in bed an extra hour just to let my mind sift through the images and emotions that played through my sleep. I often dream of piranhas since we got Bug Bear, but that’s beside the point!
Up at 7:00 this morning, fed the beasties, and then Dave and I went for a long walk on the beach. We didn’t take a watch because I didn’t want to obsess about time. There are enough days when life has to be run on the clock, everything scheduled as to not miss my train, to get this project done on time, not be late to work, whatever. Today for instance, I want to have all my posting and emailing done by noon so I can get back to work on my novel. But I wasn’t willing to sacrifice the pleasure of my morning walk and part of that pleasure is turning back when I feel like it, not because the Watch Tells Me It’s Time.
There’s an expression ‘White man’s time’ that I’ve heard, referring to the tendency to be goal/time oriented, always racing to the next activity or event rather than enjoying the process and living in the moment. I’ve found when I can zen out about my projects and my day, time stretches out like taffy. One hour magically lasts for half a day and I get so much more accomplished because I’m not worrying about it. Our walk felt like hours, yet was only two and when we got home, I still had plenty of time to meet my self-imposed start time for working on the novel. I am not thinking about the fact tomorrow is Monday and I have to be back at my day job. I will not say or even think ‘I don’t want to go to work tomorrow.’ It’s not tomorrow yet, is it? So why waste a second of my lovely long weekend by worrying about it?
Worrying is definitely wasted time! And sleep, one of those gifts you don’t appreciate until you don’t have it anymore. Good sleep is better than vacation.
You’re doing great. Just tagged your for another meme. Memer Memer. 🙂 Zhadi.
Heh. I saw the meme and already wrote my post for tomorrow! And as advance warning in case they stop here today, I tagged Marvin (again ’cause it’s fun!), Joanna and Helen. Bwahahahahahah!!!!
Me? When did I get tagged? And for what?
Mmmm. I will not worry about being tagged. Mmm. I’m zenning by imagining Dana walking calmly sans watch along the beach. Breathe in, breathe out. Mmm.
Heeee…You got tagged in my post that will be posted tomorrow. I am just giving you warning. But the sans watch beach walk is definitely a better thing to think about!
I’m glad to know that I’m not the only one who has those “darkest before dawn” moments. I envy you the walk on the beach. I won’t get one today. Hubby and I did have dinner overlooking the water last night without kids and that was as peaceful and zen like as I’ve had this week. Good luck with the writing.
Teagan Oliver
White-man’s time – lol. I’m in an interracial marriage, and I long ago learned about BST – “Black Savings Time.” It’s a big joke in the African-American communities that events don’t start at the appointed time – they start on BST – usually an hour or so late – hee hee. Years ago, my wife & I went to her brother’s wedding, it was to start at 2pm EST. In my “white-man’s time’ naivety, I insisted we be on time. My wife assured me there was no need or rush. Sure enough, the BRIDE AND GROOM were both late TO THEIR OWN WEDDING by an hour and a half!
Takes all kinds to make a world – lol
Teagan, I think most of us have those moments at some point or another in our lives. I always try to tell myself there’s no point in circular thinking and to go back to sleep, but there are times our minds just won’t let go. Having dinner overlooking the water sounds as lovely as a walk on the beach!
Marvin, I heard that expression from a Native American – guess it’s just us stick-up-the-butt white folks who let our lives be run by a clock! Although an hour and a half late to one’s own wedding seems a bit much to me… 🙂 I guess it’s all a matter of perspective! And whether or not you have some place else to be AFTER the wedding!
Amen.
I’ve read a lot lately about enjoying time & the joy of waiting… I think the universe is trying to tell me something.